Wow. I have changed a lot since my last post. I don't exactly know why or how. Nothing major happened really, except that this guy, JH, asked me to Homecoming back in October, and I said yes, and then all this stuf happened. I don't really find that stuff worthy of your brain... I won't bore you with it.

So I read these wonderful books: The Secret Texts trilogy by Holly Lisle. Diplomacy of Wolves, Vengeance of Dragons, Courage of Falcons. I'm not quite done with Courage of Falcons actually, but I know it will be incredible. Holly Lisle is one of my favorite authors now. She has magnificent language, and the plot is so developed and enthralling.

I definately recommend.

~EM

I haven't written in a long long time. A lot of stuff has happened. My boyfriend and I broke up. He was so perfect. And every time he's so nice to me now, it makes my stomach ache. If I were him, I wouldn't even speak to me. Lame. And so Homecoming is going to be cool, and I really want someone to ask me because that would rock. But I wouldn't have a problem with going with a bunch of girl friends like I did last year. Last year, my boyfriend moved to California four days before Homecoming. It sucked. So marching band is kicking up. It's so tough. Pressure to be better is crazy, and all the people are hard to keep up with. And Tyler. And then ther'es this whole aspect from this other guy. It's insane. I just wish I was blind.

EM

I've been keeping quite busy for these past couple of days. I got back from Florida on Thursday night, so Friday was spent unpacking and cleaning. Then Saturday I cleaned and cleaned and cleaned all day. We have to clean so much because my mom and dad want to move out west. I'm really excited that we'll be moving, but I don't want to leave my friends. Now I know how bad it was for PL to leave everyone and ship off to Cali. So we're fixing up this house and puttign it on the market, and we're renting another house around here and living there while we try to sell this house. We won't be mvoing until after my sister graduates, which is after this school year. I already know what I'll miss the most besides CCC... my ZM.

<3
EM

So today was reasonably eventful. It was only reasonably so because tomorrow my family and I are going to Florida. I've had so much work to do. Work always makes me groan. Bad habit. But I know that if I want to be an Air Force cadet and a missionary to Uganda - yes, I do - then I must immediately remind myself in a work situation that it is necessary work. Sometimes I have to pretend that I have to clean my bathroom on a secret mission from the commanding officer.

When my sister and I were little kids, we would make believe that the president of the United States wanted us to have our room clean in exactly one hour, and we'd rush around and clean and clean and clean as fast as we could to get it done so that we could be rewarded with a medal of honor.

My sister and I used to be bosom friends. I was very susceptible to her because she's older than me. I remember at our old house we had a ditch in our backyard, and we built this plank into it. My sister and I would pretend that she was a princess, and I was the prince, and my little brother was the evil sorcerer. The evil sorcerer would force the princess to walk the plank into the pit of snakes, and I, the prince, had to save her. One day, I asked my sister if I could play the role of the princess for once. She said, "Of course, but not today, okay? I'll let you be the princess next time." So I agreed to be the prince once more. Every time we'd play, I asked the same question, and every time she'd answer the same way: "I promise, next time you will be the princess." Sometimes she had to bribe me, but mostly I just consented to be the prince for just one more time. Every time. And then we moved. And there was no more pretend pit of snakes.

And I never got to be the princess. And in a way I think that defines my whole relationship with my sister. I'm always getting gypped. Cheated. Conned. Decieved. Duped. Misled. Scammed. Tricked.

Used.

And there's nothing I can do about it. Because I love her a lot. Because she is my sister. No matter how many times she gets to play the princess. Because if I put myself in her shoes... if I only put myself into my sister's shoes... my feet would be too big for them.

EM

i cry and clap
as you walk by-
a line of brown,
camoflaged
yet standing out
against the white
of the airport floor-
coming through
the throng of people
who carry knives
when you're away,
stabbing helplessly,
unknowingly,
yet some do know.
the acceptance they seek
with all their hearts
lies not in this world,
not in peace,
for peace may never be-
not entirely at least-
but there is hope
in the blood,
there is peace
in the death.
i cry and clap
for you
because it is my dream
to be like you:
heroic,
brave,
strong.
i see your faces
as you walk by-
not just brown,
but white,
and tan,
and peachy-
yet no matter what color,
all your faces speak
with one voice
in a chorus of humility.
my heart goes out
because of the hurt,
and pain,
and misunderstandings,
and i can't believe
the nerve
of those who stand in your way.
yet emotionally
and physically
it is well with my soul.

Hello. Yes, this is my blog. No, I will not utter any personals like my name. Yes, I have supplied my E-mail for those who wish to take my posts into consideration and have some personal attachments thereof and decide to connect to something greater than themselves, also known as friendship.

This is my blog.

Hmm.

I wish I had something inpirational, a snag of sorts, something that will interest whoever happens to stumble upon this blog, this glimpse into my heart, this piece of my mind, this scope for imagination, this window into my soul. It is a matter of character. And imagination.

I will tell the reader about myself. Yes, that's what I'll do. I am a person. I love figure skating. I go to school. I have a family and friends. I love to write, especially poetry. And I love photography. I am an artist, but I'm modest with my artwork, and I probably won't display many of them on this blog. But I will be glad to share my writings. Of course, yes, my writings. The universal, respected, faithful "way of the words," if I may say so.

Thus marks the beginning, the Newest Beginning. My blog.

Enjoy.

Yours,
EM

P.S: Indeed, I will leave some signature letters, a clue of sorts to the mystery-seekers of this world that so many dive into with mind, body, soul, and heart, into which I have so recently dipped my toes.